Articles

Sept. 7, 2025

Gospel Reflection: “Hating” So As To Love

Twenty-Third Sunday in Ordinary Time (Year C)

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Great crowds were traveling with Jesus, and he turned and addressed them, “If anyone comes to me without hating his father and mother, wife and children, brothers and sisters, and even his own life, he cannot be my disciple.” Luke 14:25–26

Why would Jesus exhort the “great crowds” to hate their families? In fact, Jesus went even further than that. He said they must also hate their own lives. If they do not, then they cannot be His disciples. One thing that this shocking teaching did was to shake people out of their lukewarm faith. Sometimes we think of Jesus only as a kind and gentle soul Who always brightens people’s days. We see images painted of the smiling Jesus Who always made people feel welcomed and loved. And though these images have truth, it is also true that one way He brightened their days was by challenging them to the core of their being to convert. And that is what Jesus does today in our Gospel.

To hate your father, mother, children, siblings and even your very self is obviously not a reference to the sin of hate that flows from anger. In this case, the word “hate” refers to the best way to love others and to love even your own self. To begin, let’s look at the conclusion. Jesus said that this form of hate is a requirement of being His disciple. This is the key. Unless we are first and foremost a disciple of Christ, we cannot love others and we will not even love ourselves in the proper way. “Hate” in this context refers to selfish attachments. This means that people and things can easily get in the way of our love of God. When they do, we must see them as an obstacle to both the love of God, as well as to the authentic love of others and even ourselves. For example, if a family member were to demand in some way that you love them more than you love God, then this must be rejected with passion. This could be referred to as holy hatred of the temptation, not the person. Say a spouse criticizes you for attending Mass and tries to stop you from doing so. If you listen to them, then you are placing them before God. Or say someone hurts you and you choose to forgive them, only to have a family member challenge you and try to stir up anger in you toward that person. If you listen to them, then you are not listening to God. In these cases, we must “hate” in the sense that we reject the temptation.

What about yourself? How do you hate yourself? This is a reference to the many ways that our disordered appetites are drawn to sin. If we indulge in the disordered desires, or even worse, if we treat those disordered desires as normal and good for us, then we have chosen the disordered desire over God. In that case, we must learn to hate and reject the selfish and disordered desire, choosing God and His will alone.

When we are able to choose the love of God first and foremost in our lives, rejecting the temptations that come through others and even the temptations within our disordered desires, then, and only then, are we in a position to love others and ourselves, in the right way. Jesus obviously wants us to love others and ourselves. But this is only possible when our love is pure and holy and flows from the love of God. Any other form of “love” is not love at all. It is a selfish attachment that hinders our true mission as lovers of God and instruments of that love to others.

Reflect, today, upon the passion that you must have to reject all forms of sin. This includes sin that tempts you through the mediation of your family and friends. It also includes every form of temptation that arises within you on account of your disordered human nature. This holy hatred is an act of love in that it seeks to eliminate everything that keeps you from true love. Choose, today, to be a faithful disciple of Jesus and commit yourself to reject all that seeks to interfere with this choice. Doing so will not only increase your love for God, it will also increase your love for others, and even your love for your own soul.

My passionate Lord, You exhorted the crowds to reject every form of temptation that interfered with their love of You. Please fill my soul with a holy hatred for sin and all temptation so that I can reject them with passion. May I love You above all things and from that love, love others and even my own soul with Your Sacred Heart. Jesus, I trust in You.

Audio recording: https://youtu.be/MhN9nSiDjXU